I'm going only 30% lovey-dovey here..wouldn't want any readers to barf half way through reading this post (if, there's any readers to begin with, lah kan) I'm blaming Suresh on his post about Love ..I'm impressed that he even quoted Socrates!! hahah, Sue dear..didnt know ur such a soft-hearted love-drunk baby!
For me, Love is very simple. Before I explain why, let me tell you the pathetic bibliography of my so called love life. I've been in 3 serious relationships before. I am not proud to say that it was I who ended all 3. I'm the loser for not having the patience and toleration. ( I'm not sure if that was all I'm lacking) But I know, it was a good call for both sides to end it once and for all.. My 1st love lasted for 3 years while 2nd lasted for 4 fat years. The 3rd lasted for almost 2 years. Still friends and keeping touch,mind u. I am now in my 4th relationship which I hope is the last, soon reaching it's 5th year anniversary :) wippieyy. All these, however did not qualify me to be a Love~Doctor. yet.hahah (ambitious) but still, (feel free to correct me if I'm wrong)I believe i have the general idea on how to nurture a relationship.
Treat your partner as how u wanted to be treated. Eg 1: Having an affair/fling. Can you stand it if he's doing the same? what would you feel then? Eg 2: Do you like to be cuddled? Or getting surprises? Instead of expecting him/her to cuddle you or giving you the surprises, cuddle your partner as much as you wanted to be cuddled and give lovely surprises at least expected. Eg 3: Before you start lying to him/her, ask yourself could you take if he/she is lying to you? Don't make make him/her jealous if you don't like to be jealous, don't hurt him/her if you yourself don't like to be hurt. That is how sometimes Loyalty is earned...
Forgiving is one of the hardest thing to do but before you decide to give him/her a cold shove, imagine if it was u in the other end and ask yourself do u deserve to be forgiven?
Love & appreciate each other like there's no tomorrow. This might sound too cheesy but, imagine if one of you had an accident and died tomorrow (touchwood!) The sore of regret would be too much to handle.Try and watch this movie If Only by Jennifer Love Hewitt and you'll understand what i mean.I never cried for movies but I almost did for this one. In Cloverfield, they were extremely lucky to find each other and in the end die together while saying their I-love-you's. EXTREMELY lucky! (eyes-rolling kind of luck).why can't it be like this?- He: I love you babe. She: Err..I love you too but i think I'm in love with someone else now. (Kaboooommmm!!!! Both died) damn, that would be cool! Back to the subject. This is to justify why you should never hold back what you feel towards each other until it's too late.
Patience is virtue and so is Tolerance...there's a limit to it but you wont regret if you use them as much as possible. You wont see the outcome there and then but in given time and day, you will earn your gold. Eg: Before shouting at him/her try and stay calm and resolve it nicely. I have to admit that it's an ultimate relief to shout but the truth is shouting would only make it worse where the shouting contest would start then comes the throwing stuff at each other and finally the violence (beating etc) then finally the crying.It would be too late then for the wound would be too deep to heal.
NEVER go for looks! unless you have a mind-reading ability, your 1st impression might change once you get to know a person. At that point of time you will only realize that he/she has a great personality and that what makes him/her irresistible! Never ever expect to get a partner who resembles your fave celebrity.Looks will fade, teeth & hair will fall, boobs will sag and skin will wrinkle.and there you go..a crumpled,knee-shaking partner for life! If it's personality that you're succumb to, trust me, it's an eternal charm which will definitely last longer than looks.
There are more in regards to nurturing love but these are the things I actually applied in life but sometimes forgot to do so for love.This post would be a reminder for me too keep this essentials as my principles in both love & life from now on..
God, I'm soo super cheesy this time and the blame is on you, Suresh !!. Let's go barf now! Bbbbwwwweerrrkkkhh!!!