I am now 36weeks pregnant with my 2nd child, Alhamdulillah. And again, Alhamdulillah it will be a girl this time, InShaaAllah :) Finally I don't need to drool & look stupid each time I go goo-goo-gaga over a flowery frocks or pink booties while pushing a baby boy in the stroller. Yeay!
InShaaAllah, Alee's 1st younger sister (yes yes..we r planning to have more) will be named 'Aymee' which means 'blessings' in Arabic.
It was only less than a year gap from my 1st delivery so in between the new baby & my career, I have not got the chance to go all out with my outdoor activities that I love so much such as mountain biking, hiking and traveling. To get back into shape took me half a year, to get my stamina & pace back was another demotivating issue because I don't see the point of working for it if I am planning for a 2nd child right away after my son starts walking steadily (11months). Now who would have understand that particular situation where it would just be labelled as an 'excuse'. Yes, only another mother who is going/had gone through the same thing would. Fathers? Sonetimes they get it, but most of the time they don't. Sorry guys, you really really have not got a clue how it is like to watch /let you go do what we both love to do together before the baby comes while we pregnant women sloth at home either vomitting until we are as green+thin as a celery stick for the 1st 4 months then dragging our heavy feet, bulging belly & aching back 24/7 for the next 5 months. Oh we don't sloth by then since the nesting period starts at 6 months onwards, so we sort of strut & dash here and there fretting over crumpled baby hankies or digging over the old boxes for newborn toys to wash and dry for the new baby with a ticking sound at the back of our mind remibdibg us we don't have much time left and the baby is coming anytime soon now.
The sacrifices we women make to be pregnant and deliver a baby is not just about the shape of our body, dear men and fathers out there. It's sacrificing the type of life we have built and love for so much before (and still do). Starting from our body shape, our unpredictable raging hormones (it was already unpredictable when we were not pregnant so imagine how bad it is when we are), the type of fashion we have to let go to fit the new body shape and ease our daily routine to accomodate things like breastfeeding, baby puke/drool and does not show how much you have sweat from 'mummsies sport' activities such as either chasing after your toddler or changing their diapers while pinning them down on the changing matt with your other hand (yes, that requires some wrestling, screaming, threatening and tons of sweating) or lifting the stroller in and out of the car trunk in a rush -worried of possible hijackers while you are meddling at the back of the car while your toddler is in their car seat.
How can I possibly be satisfied with all that compared to the things I had to let go when fathers can choose their time to put on or take off their world's-greatest-daddy hats and go enjoy their outdoor activities still? While we women will be either too busy with work, house chores or family commitments so we have no time at all to do what we love to do. It's a 'world's-greatest-mum hat stitched around our head.
So no, this is not a regret. It is only a frustration.